The Daily Egyptian is published by the students of SIU at Carbondale. Except during vacations and exam weeks, The Daily Egyptian is published Monday through Friday during the fall and spring semesters and TWThF during the summer semester."

The Wednesday Wives

MARION - Layla Bazan is lost in a country she doesn't know. So is her new husband, Justin, who is driving transports on the other side of the world.

Life is tough, she admits, but she has found one cure for the heartache.

Getting her hair done. Weekly.

"I've been trying to get a life started," said Layla, a native of England, while getting her hair styled at Color FX in Marion. "It's been really hard. I'm not sure where I fit in.

"Things like this keep you going. We come and get our hair done and have a good time."

Welcome to the Wednesday Wives Club. Now in its second month, the club meets Wednesday nights at Color FX and provides a network of friends for women who have family members serving in Iraq. Sure, while they're sipping on wine and chatting about this and that, the war comes up - occasionally. So do a lot of other things.

Hair, of course.

Tanning? You bet.

Testicle jokes?

Just look at the sign outside:

"Frozen chestnuts? Come warm them in our tanning bed."

"We have a lot of fun," said Lachelle Williams, a stylist at the salon who, admittedly, has enough sass and spunk for 12 women.

There are enough jokes to fill the smoky room for an entire night, but deep down, one serious thing rests on each of their minds: Iraq. What's going on there, how long will it last, and when will the boys be coming home? For Bazan, the answer to that is dark and depressing: October. Almost an entire year. When all is said and done, that's a longer period of time than she has known her husband.

She wonders if he will be the same when he comes back.

Layla, 21, hails originally from Leeds, a town north of London. After her first meeting with Justin over the Internet, Layla split the cost of an airplane ticket with him in order to visit his home in Marion. She came to America about seven months ago, and when the two met face-to-face, they were both smitten.

"We felt strongly about each other," Layla said. "I said I loved him, he said he loved me, and I never went home."

They were married on the fourth of last August. Three days later, Justin shipped off to Kuwait to drive transports. In the meantime, Layla has spent four months grappling with a new life in America, trying to forge a new path with the closest thing she has to a family here - Justin's mother, Pam, and his sister, Christie.

They, too, worry about Justin, and all three are concerned about some of the dark changes they see in his words on the rare occasions they get to speak with him.

Pam said Justin has no clue why he's in the Middle East. He just knows that he is there, thousands of miles from home.

None of them truly understands what is going on.

"I see no reason for it," Pam said. "They're kids. They have no idea what they're doing or why."

Christie, for her part, is even more pointed with her criticism.

"If we have so much poverty and crime here, why are we over there?" she asked. "We have our own problems to deal with."

Cande Nicks, another member of the club, is at her wit's end with the military. Her husband, Russell, is a sergeant first class serving in Baghdad, and when their 17-year-old daughter's diabetes worsened earlier this year, she pleaded with the military to send him home to be with his family. Despite all her efforts, they didn't send him back.

Now, she said, the war and the military are threatening the stability of her marriage, and she said her husband better not accept another assignment when his service expires next year.

"He has to turn it down," she said. "If he doesn't, I might not stay married to him."

For all of the dark moments, however, the Wednesday Wives Club is not about brooding. Five to 15 members show up weekly, and in addition talking, they also get discounts at the salon. Williams, who issued membership cards this week, is trying to convince local businesses to offer discounts as well, and if reporters are not asking them about their men overseas, odds are Iraq would only come up in passing.

But despite the smiles and laughs, they all know the truth. Those closest to them are half a world away, and even the most trivial of communications, such as a 10-minute instant message exchange Layla had with Justin Wednesday, are major events.

Layla, now coming to terms with her new life, tries to stay optimistic. She admits becoming annoyed and angry with what is going on and said she realizes so many plans she had made for the future are now in indefinite limbo. Still, she tries to keep her chin up and think of happier times.

"We had so many plans," she said "But you can either wallow in misery or you can go on."

Christie, taking her turn in the salon chair, said that's what the club is all about.

"In a support group, people sit around and cry," she said. "That's not what this is."

For more information on the Wednesday Wives Club, contact Lachelle at 998-0977

 

 

[Macro error: Can't include because the file is larger than 32767 characters.]

Today's News | Sports | Voices - Editorial | Letters
Newsbriefs | pulse - Arts & Entertainment | Calendar | Photo Staff
Apts & Rentals | Photo Personals | Live DE NewsCam | Classified Ads